 There comes a time in many women’s lives when their bodies begin to feel… unfamiliar.
You may notice shifts that don’t quite make sense. Fatigue that lingers, emotions that feel harder to regulate, sleep that no longer restores you, or a body that seems to respond differently no matter what you try. If you’ve found yourself thinking, “I don’t feel like myself anymore,” please know this: You are not broken. You are not alone. And your body is not working against you. You may be entering perimenopause or menopause, a powerful, natural transition that too often goes unrecognized, misunderstood or unsupported. When Your Body Feels Like a Stranger For many women, perimenopause begins quietly. Cycles may shift. Energy dips. Mood changes appear without warning. You might feel disconnected from your body, like the rhythms you once understood are now unpredictable. And yet, when you seek answers, you’re often met with confusion—or worse, dismissal. You may hear:
Little Known Truths About Perimenopause & Menopause There is so much about this stage of life that women are simply not taught. Let’s bring a few important truths into the light: 1. Perimenopause Can Start Earlier Than You Think Many women believe menopause begins in their 50s, but perimenopause can begin as early as the late 30s or early 40s, sometimes even sooner. 2. It’s So Much More Than Hot Flashes While hot flashes are commonly discussed, there are 30+ possible symptoms, including anxiety and panic attacks, brain fog and memory issues, joint pain and inflammation, sleep disturbances, mood swings and irritability and weight redistribution (especially around the midsection). 3. Hormones Impact Your Entire Body These changes don’t just affect your cycle. They influence your metabolism, your mental health, your cardiovascular system and your bone density. 4. Many Women Are Misdiagnosed or Undersupported Because awareness is limited, many women are told they have depression, thyroid disorders or chronic fatigue. While these conditions can be real, hormonal shifts are often a missing piece of the puzzle. The Reality of Women’s Healthcare in Midlife Here’s the hard truth: Women’s health, especially in midlife, has historically been under-researched and underfunded. Many healthcare providers receive little formal training in menopause care. As a result:
Menopause Isn't the End of Life as You Know It-It’s an Invitation What if this season isn’t something to endure… but something to step into with intention? Menopause is not an ending, it’s an invitation. An invitation to:
My Journey & Why I Do This Work Like my work as a doula, this work is deeply personal to me. I’m not speaking from a distance, I am walking through this stage of life too. I understand what it feels like to question your body, to search for answers and to desire a sense of balance and clarity again. That’s why I'm introducing my Menopause Lifestyle Coaching—to offer women the kind of support I know is needed in this season. A Holistic Approach to Menopause Support Through my coaching (I actually prefer mentoring), I provide physical and mental guidance and support for the real-life challenges of perimenopause and menopause. This is not a one-size-fits-all approach. Your body, your lifestyle and your needs are unique. Together, we focus on:
If you’ve been feeling disconnected, overwhelmed or unsure of what’s happening in your body, I want you to know that: There is support available to you. There is knowledge that can empower you. There are ways to feel like yourself again—grounded, energized, and whole. You deserve more than just getting through this season. You deserve to thrive in it. If you’re ready to better understand your body and feel supported in this transition, I invite you to connect with me. Let’s walk this journey together with intention, education and care.
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 Returning to work after having a baby is a deeply personal and often emotional experience. It’s a significant milestone that can bring a mix of pride, anxiety, and guilt. For many new parents, this transition means not only adapting to a new daily routine but also coping with the emotional strain of being away from their baby for extended periods. If you're approaching this chapter, know that you're not alone and that preparation, both physically and emotionally, can make a world of difference. The Emotional Reality of Returning to Work One of the biggest challenges new moms and dads face when returning to work is the emotional tug-of-war that comes with leaving their baby in someone else’s care. Whether your little one is staying with a family member, a nanny, or going to daycare, it can be heart-wrenching to walk away each morning knowing someone else will witness their smiles, feedings, and firsts during the day. Common emotional challenges include:
Preparing Physically: Establishing a New Routine The key to easing back into work is creating a routine that supports both your well-being and your baby's needs. Here’s how to get started: 1. Practice the Morning Routine Early- A week or two before your official return, do a few trial runs of your morning schedule. Wake up at the time you would for work, get yourself and your baby ready, and leave the house as if you’re heading to work. This helps both of you adjust to the rhythm without the pressure of a real workday. 2. Build a Consistent Sleep and Feeding Schedule- Work with your baby to find a predictable sleep and feeding schedule that aligns with your working hours. This will help the person caring for your baby maintain consistency, which is comforting for babies and reassuring for you. If you are planning to pump while you are working, be sure to make the necessary arrangements to be able to do so (pumping space, scheduled time for pumping sessions and milk storage). 3. Prepare Meals and Outfits Ahead of Time- Evening preparation is a game-changer. Lay out clothes, prep bottles, pack your lunch, and organize your baby’s diaper bag the night before to minimize morning stress. 4. Prioritize Self-Care- Returning to work isn’t just about your baby—it’s also about you. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, staying hydrated, and incorporating some gentle movement (even a walk counts). A healthy mom is a happier, more present mom. Preparing Emotionally: Coping with Separation and Change 1. Visit and Trust the Caregiver- Spend time getting to know the caregiver or daycare staff. Observe how they interact with your baby and ask plenty of questions. Feeling confident in who’s caring for your baby can ease separation anxiety and help you focus at work. 2. Start with Short Separations- Ease into longer days apart by starting with shorter separations if possible. Begin with a few hours and gradually extend the time. This allows both you and your baby to adjust more gently. 3. Stay Connected During the Day- Ask your caregiver to send updates or photos throughout the day. A quick message can offer enormous comfort and help bridge the distance. 4. Create Special Rituals- Make the most of the time you do have. Create simple morning or bedtime rituals that are just for you and your baby. Whether it's singing a special song, reading a book, or snuggling before bed, these moments will be cherished and help strengthen your bond. 5. Give Yourself Grace- Some days will be harder than others. There may be tears (from both of you), forgotten items, or guilt that creeps in unexpectedly. Allow yourself to feel all of it without judgment. You’re doing your best—and that’s enough.  You may never feel like you’ve achieved perfect balance, and that’s okay. The key is finding a rhythm that works for your unique family. Remember: Going back to work doesn’t mean you’re choosing your career over your child. It means you’re providing for your family, showing your baby what resilience looks like, and continuing to grow as a person and a parent.
Lean on your village, trust your instincts, and don’t forget—you’ve already done something incredible by becoming a mother. Returning to work is just another way you’re showing up with strength and love. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to returning to work after baby. But by preparing your routine, nurturing your emotional health, and building a support system, you can ease the transition and create a life where both you and your baby can thrive.  The Honest Truth: parenting is hard. Not just “I’ve-been-up-all-night” hard, or “my-toddler-just-flushed-my-keys” hard. I'm talking next-level hard. And while sleep deprivation, mystery stains, and the eternal search for matching socks play their part, there's one sneaky culprit that makes this whole parenting thing truly bananas:
Everyone suddenly becomes a parenting expert. Yep. The real reason parenting is so hard? It’s not your baby. It’s your great aunt Carol, your neighbor Sharon, the random barista who just “has to say something,” and don’t forget the infinite scroll of contradictory advice from Instagram moms who look like they haven’t ever had spit-up on their sweaters. The real reason parenting is so hard is because everybody has an opinion on how YOU should parent YOUR child(ren). How Sway?! You bring your baby to the park and someone tells you they’re underdressed. Another tells you they’re overdressed. One stranger says co-sleeping is the only way, while another gasps in horror that your baby isn’t in their crib at 7:03 p.m. sharp. If babies came with instruction manuals, every page would be written in a different handwriting—with conflicting advice in the margins. Welcome to the wild ride of unsolicited parenting wisdom. But here’s the thing no one tells you enough (unless you’ve got that one cool friend who keeps it real): You’re allowed to ignore the noise. In fact, you should. Because the truth is, nobody—not your mom, not your pediatrician (okay, maybe a little bit your pediatrician), and definitely not that Facebook mom’s group—is raising your baby. You are. And you’re going to get a lot of things right. You’re also going to mess some stuff up. That’s called parenting. It’s not a mistake, it’s how it works. Every cry, every giggle, every midnight panic-Google (please don't Google) builds your parenting muscle. You don’t learn how to parent by reading all the blogs (yes, including this one—ironic, I know). You learn it the old-fashioned way: by doing it. By trial. By error. By rerouting. And by trusting that little voice inside you that says, “Okay, I’ve got this. I think.” So, the next time someone offers you the tip that “saved their baby’s sleep/feeding/sanity,” smile politely. Say “Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind.” And then do whatever the heck you think is right. Because you're not raising their baby. You’re raising yours. And you're doing great—even if your shirt is inside out and your toddler just ate a crayon. Hang in there, trust your gut, and remember: no one knows your baby like you do. Someday you’ll get to give your own unsolicited advice. Just think of it as a rite of passage.  Giving birth is a most assuredly a transformative experience—physically, emotionally, and mentally. But one aspect that often doesn’t get enough attention is the impact childbirth can have on the pelvic floor. Whether you had a vaginal delivery or a cesarean section, your pelvic floor muscles have supported you through pregnancy and birth, and they deserve some care and attention during your postpartum recovery. Let's explore what the pelvic floor is, why it’s so crucial to your well-being after childbirth, and practical ways to strengthen it during the postpartum period. What is the Pelvic Floor? The pelvic floor is a group of muscles and connective tissues that stretch like a hammock from your pubic bone to your tailbone. These muscles support key organs including the bladder, uterus, and rectum. They also play a critical role in urinary and bowel control, sexual function, and core stability. Why is Pelvic Floor Health Important Postpartum? During pregnancy, your pelvic floor carries the increasing weight of your growing uterus. Then, during vaginal birth, these muscles stretch significantly, sometimes tearing or weakening. Even if you had a cesarean section, pregnancy alone can put strain on the pelvic floor. Common postpartum issues related to pelvic floor dysfunction include:
When Can You Start Pelvic Floor Exercises? Generally, you can begin gentle pelvic floor exercises, often called Kegels, within a few days after birth, especially if you feel ready and comfortable. However, every birth is different, so it’s essential to:
 How to Strengthen Your Pelvic Floor Postpartum
Here are simple, safe ways to start restoring your pelvic floor health after birth: 1. Kegels- These are small but powerful contractions that help rebuild strength and endurance in your pelvic floor.
2. Pelvic Tilts- Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat. Gently tilt your pelvis so your lower back presses into the floor, then release. This helps engage your deep abdominal muscles along with the pelvic floor. 3. Diaphragmatic Breathing- Deep breathing helps reduce intra-abdominal pressure and allows the pelvic floor to move naturally.
4. See a Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist- If you’re dealing with discomfort, incontinence, or just want expert support, a pelvic floor PT can create a personalized plan to help you recover safely and effectively. Pelvic floor recovery isn’t a race. Healing takes time, and every body is different. Rest, hydration, and gentle movement are all part of the equation. And remember: asking for help, whether from your OBGYN, a physical therapist, or a postpartum coach, is a sign of strength, not weakness. Caring for your pelvic floor after childbirth is one of the best investments you can make in your long-term health and quality of life. Whether you’re newly postpartum or a few years into parenthood, it’s never too late to start. Strong doesn’t mean “bouncing back”, it means building back better, with awareness, support, and self-compassion. Got questions? Contact me for resources and recommendations for local pelvic floor therapists.  Becoming a parent is often described as one of life’s most joyful experiences. But what many new parents don’t expect is that joy can coexist with anxiety, sadness, irritability, or even despair. For many new parents, the flood of hormones, sleep deprivation, and life changes can bring on an abundance of feelings. These early emotions are often referred to as the "baby blues", and they affect up to 80% of new mothers. Thankfully, baby blues usually fade within two weeks. But what happens when those feelings don’t go away or they get worse? If you’re experiencing lingering or intense emotional distress after having a baby, you may be dealing with a Perinatal Mental Health Disorder (PMHD). PMHDs are the most common complications of childbirth, affecting up to 1 in 5 new moms and 1 in 10 new dads. Let's explore what Perinatal Mental Health Disorders (PMHDs) are, how to spot the warning signs, who is at higher risk, and—most importantly—where to get support. What are PMHDs?
PMHDs (Perinatal Mental Health Disorders) include a range of mental health conditions that can occur during pregnancy and up to a year postpartum. They include:
Who is at risk for PMHDs? PMHDs can affect anyone, regardless of background. However, certain factors can increase vulnerability:
Some sobering statistics:
Warning Signs to Watch For It's normal to feel emotionally sensitive or tearful in the days following birth. This is often referred to as the “baby blues” and typically resolves within 1–2 weeks. But when symptoms persist or intensify, it could be a sign of a PMHD. Here are some signs that what you're feeling might be more than just baby blues: Emotional Symptoms:
Physical and Behavioral Symptoms:
If these symptoms last more than two weeks after birth, interfere with your daily functioning, or feel like they’re getting worse, it’s time to seek help. What to Do Next: Steps Toward Healing Please know that you are not weak and you are not alone if you are experiencing signs of a perinatal mental health disorder. Here's what you can do to seek help: 1. Talk to your healthcare provider- Let your OB/GYN, midwife, or primary care doctor know how you're feeling. They can screen you for PMHDs and connect you with mental health professionals. 2. Reach out to a therapist- Look for a therapist who specializes in perinatal mental health. Many offer telehealth appointments, which can be especially helpful with a newborn. 3. Connect with support groups- Sometimes, talking to other parents who have been there can be incredibly healing. Peer support groups can reduce isolation and offer real-world advice. 4. Involve your partner or support system- Let those close to you know what you’re experiencing. They may be able to help with baby care, offer emotional support, or attend appointments with you. 5. Emergency support- If you're having thoughts of self-harm or harming your baby, seek emergency help immediately by calling emergency services or going to the nearest ER. Resources for Support Here are some trusted organizations offering help:
If you’re struggling right now, please know: this is not your fault. PMHDs can affect anyone, and with help, they do get better. You deserve support, healing, and peace during this chapter of parenthood. Take the first step. Help is waiting. To learn more about PMHDs and the fourth trimester, sign up for my Postpartum Recovery Class. |
About the AuthorKelly Collins Archives
May 2026
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