Category: Childbirth

Navigating the Wonder Years

6/23/2023

It is well known that new parents, especially first-time parents, need time adjusting to parenthood. The sleepless nights, endless feedings and countless diapers can feel like one big blur during the first year. Not to mention all the other adulting and responsibilities on your plate. And with the world changing on a daily basis, it can be difficult navigating parenthood and deciding what is right for you and your family. Friends and family will come to visit and give gifts but in the long run, you may find yourself in isolation and figuring things out on your own. Doula support is one way to acquire the extra support you need and they are typically available during pregnancy, birth and the fourth trimester. But what if you need more?

For the past several months I have been working to create a way to support more parents. After speaking with several new and expecting moms and learning more about what they really need, I have expanded my virtual care and designed a more personalized way to serve them.

Navigating the Wonder Years is personalized virtual doula support for new parents (pregnancy to 12 months postpartum) who are seeking guidance to be confident and emotionally healthy figures for their children. During pregnancy, parents will receive childbirth education and informational resources to help prepare for birth. During the postpartum period, parents will receive guidance on recovery & healing, newborn care and parenting.

An Overview
Navigating the Wonder Years is not your cookie cutter virtual doula support. It is customized parental mentorship that takes an depth assessment of what you and your family need while mapping out the best course of action to support you mentally, emotionally and spiritually by providing the appropriate resources and individualized care. We will put a plan in place that will give you the necessary time and space to take care of yourself and your family while meeting the parenting and personal goals you set. The main purpose of creating your parenting plan is to build a foundation that will prepare you for the early years of parenthood and equip you with the tools to handle the challenges that will come along with them. For most parents, the first year can prove to be the hardest due to trying to balance home life, work, relationships, health and so many other things. I will help you become a confident, self-aware parent and positive influence for your little ones.

Mental & Emotional Component
Because this program does not provide hands-on or in-person service, the care will comprise of mental and emotional support to ensure that you can be the best parent and person for your family and community. The only way to do that is to make yourself a priority and put you first. You can't pour from an empty cup and we will make sure that you have everything you need to thrive during your baby's first year of life. Remember, you are your child's first teacher and your example will make a lasting imprint on their lives. The investment you make in yourself is an investment in your children.

Spiritual Component
With a deep spiritual background, I serve all of my clients with a spiritual regard. For many of my clients, prayer, church attendance, counseling, mindfulness exercises, spiritual exploration and study help provide a sense of purpose and also guide their thoughts and actions. No matter what you believe, I will help you hone in on the best practices to increase your spirituality and be more conscious of who you are and who you want to be. Expanding your spiritual outlook will be a priority as your discover what type of parent you want to be and develop your parenting style.

Is Navigating the Wonder Years right for you?
Mentorship is available to any pregnant or parent with a children under the age of one. With a monthly membership, you will receive support through virtual check-ins, resources and referrals as well as a customized parenting plan to help you be a successful parent. If you want to be proactive in getting the extra support that provides whole person wellness care, Navigating the Wonder Years may be right for you. I can only take a limited number of virtual clients at a time so don't delay. Contact me and you will receive an email with more details on how I can support you.

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Guest Blog: Saidah Pearson, RN, IBCLC

5/29/2023

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This week's guest blogger is Saidah Pearson, RN and IBCLC. She is the owner of Four Sisters Hands, a lactation support practice in the Triangle area. Learn more about Saidah's business and her much needed work with women and moms in the interview below.

1. Tell me about yourself.
I am a St. Louis native and have been in NC for five years. I am a wife and mom to four sweet little ladies! I come from a large family and am the only girl out of four kids. I am a major introvert but my children and husband force me to be an extrovert because they all have never met a stranger. I enjoy talking about all things mommy, babies, and boobs! Oh and I will forever be a reality tv girl. I can’t help myself!

2. How/why did you become an RN and IBCLC?
I have wanted to be a NICU nurse since I was 9 years old after seeing a family friend have a baby prematurely. After graduating from undergrad with a degree in Biology I went back to nursing school. I originally went to school to become a Biomedical Engineer and wanted to pursue medical research. I like to say that I took the long walk home and it gave me a better perspective when becoming a nurse. I have been a nurse for five years and spent three of those years bedside in two different Level IV NICUs in the triangle. I always knew that my end goal was to be a lactation consultant and serve medically complex families. I attended the Mary Rose Tully Training Initiative at UNC Chapel Hill to get my lactation training. I one day hope to go back to the NICU as an LC but for now I am enjoying serving the community outside of the hospital.

3. What is the mission or main focus of Four Sisters' Hands?
The mission of Four Sisters’ Hands is to truly meet families where they are and provide individualized support to help them meet their lactation goals. I have a somewhat unique approach that is rooted in focusing on the family’s goals while also presenting evidence based facts that allows them to make informed decisions. The major pillar of my work is to increase visibility and support for Black and brown families. When I was nursing my first child I did not have any physical support that looked like me or had a cultural understanding of where I was. Representation is everything and I work very hard to give support to all families but work extra hard to give support to families that look like mine.

4. What are the best & most challenging parts of being a business owner and health practitioner?
The best and worst part of being a business owner is the flexibility. I appreciate that as a stay at home mom I can truly tailor my business to the needs of my family. In the same sense there is no one to do the work but me which can be A LOT! The actual running of a business I could pass on and just do the actual work of supporting families but such is life. The best part of “the work” is helping families reach their goals. Seeing them trust themselves. Teaching the whole family about lactation. Holding space and the gift of being able to support people in their most vulnerable time of life. Oh my most absolute favorite thing is the baby snuggles!! The hardest part of “the work” is the second guessing of myself as new IBCLC. Sometimes not feeling like I know enough or have enough to give. Combating my client’s self doubt that is sometimes imposed by those closest to them.

5. Where do you see yourself and your business in 5 years?
In five years I would love to be a mentor and teacher. I want to be able to provide education for not only families but for other health providers that are in a position to support families. I also want to pour into other Black future IBCLCs because the path there is lonely and hard sometimes. Working specifically with the HBCUs in NC that are training future IBCLCs. I want to work with more NICU families on a consistent basis and help them reach their goals. I would love to have a breastfeeding clinic that could provide community support and serve as a gathering space. A place where love and care oozes out the walls and flows into the streets!

6. Who do you look up to or admire in the health community?
Janiya Williams is who I call my lactation fairy godmother in my head! She gave a presentation to our class in my lactation program and I was in awe! Not only does she positively impact her community through lactation and her support of doulas but she is also a wife and mom. She is highly respected and that doesn’t happen without being at the top of your game. She is a beacon of hope for myself that the vision that I have is not only possible but can far exceed what I think. She is what it means to provide representation to Black IBCLCs and I am grateful to know her.

7. Tell me about your most recent business win.
My most recent win was actually recommitting myself to my practice. I have had a hard time deciding how much to give to my practice while also being a stay at home mom. Going from working in the hospital as a nurse with a team to being a one woman show has been such an adjustment for me. After some really hard conversations with myself, my husband, and lots of time spent with God, I realized that this is my life’s work and I am equipped with the things I need to make it happen. Even if I don’t know the how, I will keep one foot in front of the other and things will fall in place. If I am going to bet on anything I want it to be myself!

8. Please share any upcoming events or programs you will be participating in or any special offerings for new clients?
I will be hosting my first virtual breastfeeding support group on May 17th! I am really excited because this is something I’ve wanted to do but wasn’t sure if I could. I hope to start in person meetings this fall. I am also planning to roll out prenatal breastfeeding education classes in the fall. One of my passions in lactation is prenatal breastfeeding education so I am looking forward to providing more ways for families to get support before their baby comes!

I’m Saidah RN, IBCLC. A wife and mom of four young girls based in Cary, NC. I provide in-home and virtual lactation support to families from pregnancy to weaning! I have been a nurse for five years and recently left the NICU bedside to support families in the community as an IBCLC. I love all things baby snuggles and lactation. I truly think that individualized lactation support is the key to help you reach your goals. This to me means meeting families exactly where they are, providing the information, and supporting families to make informed decisions. You can learn more about me by visiting my website and follow me on Facebook and Instagram @foursistershands.

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Trusting Your Mother's Intuition & Becoming a Confident Mom

5/12/2023

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This week's guest blog is from Tanya Josephs. You may remember that I first introduced you to her a few months ago and today she is sharing her thoughts on a motherhood and how trusting your intuition will help you to become a more confident mother.

As a mother, leaning into your intuition sounds easier than it is. Making intuitive decisions for your child can be difficult, and sometimes scary. You are exposed to the opinions of others in many different arenas: online, at work, in public, and even at home.

Trusting your decision-making skills over the opinions and advice of others takes work. Increasing your confidence in your decisions as a mother takes time. But the more time and effort you put into it, the stronger that skill will be, and the more you will trust yourself first.

A Mother's Intuition
The American Psychology Association defines intuition as “immediate insight or perception, as contrasted with conscious reasoning or reflection.” This means that you have an inner knowing, without needing to think or rationalize it.

Intuition serves us in all sorts of situations, from an everyday choice to life or death. When you become a mother, your intuition expands to serve your children.

You’ve heard of situations where a mom didn’t want her kid hanging out with another kid…she just knew they were a bad influence. Or when a mom sought out a second opinion because the pediatrician’s diagnosis didn’t sit right with her.

Maybe you have experienced that gut feeling walking into a daycare tour that told you it wasn’t the right place for your child.

Your intuition kicks in. You don’t know how or why, you just know.

External Validators
The flip side to your intuition kicking in, is whether or not you even notice.

Today’s world is full of noise. Instagram, Facebook groups, podcasts, YouTube…you are inundated with information. Online forums and apps allow us multiple points of access to multiple points of view.

The problem with this is, somewhere along the way, you get lost. Your inner voice, your intuition, has been drowned out by all of that noise.

The more external information we consume, the farther we stray from our internal compass.

And it’s not intentional. It’s just confusing.

In the first year of motherhood alone, there are so many questions and a million answers for each.

Do I breastfeed or formula feed?

Co-sleep or independent sleeping in the crib?

How long do I swaddle?

They’re not rolling yet…is that normal?

They just ate, but it hasn’t been 2 hours…do I feed them again?

Solids at 4 months or 6? Baby-led weaning?

Sleep training? Cry it out?

Do any of these sound familiar? We don’t know if we should look left or right, up or down. The books tell us one thing, pediatricians another, and family and friends something else.

In all of this confusion, we are no longer tuning in. We begin to rely on outside sources to validate our choices. (Side note - this is not to say medical knowledge and facts are not valid sources for decision-making. Any true concerns should always be communicated with your doctor).

We unconsciously start second guessing ourselves, and look to others to reassure that we are doing the right thing. We begin quieting our inner voice and convincing ourselves that we are somehow ‘wrong’; whether it’s ‘overreacting’, being ‘too anxious’ or ‘asking too many questions’. We take the focus away from what we know about our child and begin focusing on the experience and advice of others.

It’s time to tune back in and strengthen your intuition.

Trust that your inner knowing connects you to your child and allows you to make the best decisions for them.

Navigating External Validation from Our Inner Circle
While we experience a lot of external noise from outside sources, we can also receive a lot of external noise from our inner circle. Pregnancy, postpartum and parenting become frequent topics of conversation with friends, family, and even strangers.

In sharing our concerns and questions, others share their own experiences with us as a way to connect. This can sow seeds of disconnect within ourselves. Our motherhood journey begins to incorporate a lot of this external information instead our own mind-body-soul connection.

Unsolicited advice and judgments are woven so seamlessly into our everyday lives, it’s no wonder we stray from our inner voice.

A co-worker comments on how “tiny” you look while pregnant... your friend’s face reacts a little too quickly when you share your decision to sleep train… your sister responds “that’s weird, we never had that” when a new illness arises. Even your mom nonchalantly laughs when you mention you’re concerned about a new behavior you’ve noticed in your toddler.

And if we are being honest, it’s likely we have passed our own judgments onto family and friends, both intentionally and unintentionally. We may have projected fear or thoughts onto another mother in a way that affected their decision-making.

Of course, there is likely no bad intent. Just remind yourself to take everything with a grain of salt and bring your thoughts to the forefront.

Let’s always encourage ourselves, our sisters and our friends to look inward.

As you look inward, ask yourself these questions:

What does my gut say?
What do I know about this situation?
What are the facts?
Is this life-threatening?
What has past experience taught me about this situation?
Do I feel like I should seek medical advice?
Is my child acting differently than usual?
Is something just off?

When you answer these questions, don’t overthink it. Your quickest and most natural thought is typically your intuition telling you something. That’s when you lean in. Remind yourself that you know what is best for your child, and that you always have their best interest in mind.

4 Ways to Strengthen Your Intuition
Increasing your intuition is like strengthening a muscle. You have to work that muscle and find ways to activate your intuition until it becomes more and more natural. Here are 4 ways to start strengthening on your intuition today:

Practice mindfulness through meditation, breath work or simply sitting quietly for 5 minutes. This allows you to connect with yourself and hear your own thoughts.

Stop inner conflict as it happens. Shut down negative thoughts that make you question what you are doing for your child. Affirm that you are doing what you feel is best.

Stop relying on tracking apps. There, I said it. I won’t say they aren’t helpful, but take a minute to remember to listen to your baby. Watch them for cues and signals. Your baby will likely let you know what they need when they need it. Plus, your mental health will thank you for it.

Be present. Release the schedule and don’t look at the clock. Truly take as much time as you can to get to know your baby, and let them get to know you.

This Mother’s Day, celebrate and empower yourself. Remember how far you’ve come and all of the times your intuition has served you and your child.

Commit to honoring yourself, your intuition, your instinct, the voice inside that tells you what’s right.

Tanya Josephs is a postpartum coach, helping women transition into the role of mother while empowered to maintain a sense of self. She is passionate about maternal mental health and breaking the stigma. Tanya is also a copywriter for life coaches, providing email, sales, and web copywriting services.

Originally from Rhode Island, she now lives in North Carolina with her husband and three young children. She is a practicing Doctor of Physical Therapy, self-proclaimed foodie, lover of wine, podcasts, books, and binge-worthy TV series.

To connect, email tanya@tanyajosephs.com. Find out more about copywriting services and grab your free lead magnet master list for your coaching business here.

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Pregnancy & Postpartum Subscription Boxes

5/8/2023

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Cater to Mom subscription box

Becoming a mother or parent is a very important time in one's life and it deserves a grand level of celebration. And with celebration comes gifts, right? But what should one get a new mom? What is appropriate? What will make the greatest impact but also show that you care?

There are so many modern products and gadgets that seem useful, but in reality are useless and can prove to disrupt the parents' physiological response to addressing their baby's needs. Subscription boxes are a great solution to the abundant needs that come with pregnancy and parenthood. From self care items to diapers to postpartum products, subscription boxes can be the perfect gift for new parents during this life-changing transition.

Each one of the subscriptions boxes listed below offer a variety of products and gifts for moms and some for the entire family. They include a brief description and are categorized for your convenience.

Be sure to check out the Mother's Day offers & discounts these subscription boxes are currently offering!

General

Bump Boxes-safe and healthy products delivered to moms monthly. (very popular)

The Stork Bag- luxury boxes designed to pamper moms-to-be

Ecocentric Mom-boxes for the eco-friendly mom/family

Mama Bird Box- a one-time box for pregnant & new moms customized for her health and wellbeing

Oh Baby Boxes- custom, high quality boxes for pregnancy & postpartum (1, 3 and 6 month plans, very popular)

DoulaBox-quarterly box curated by a doula for each trimester, including the fourth trimester

PreggoBox-luxury gifts for expecting and postpartum moms using handcrafted gift items from Canadian vendors

The Belly Bundle-boxes with healthy products, maternity apparel and must-haves for motherhood (1, 6, 9 and 12 month subscription options)

Happy Mango-boxes that include items for care for mom, for baby, clothing, blankets, snacks and more (1, 3, 6 and 9 month options)

Rumbly-exclusive pregnancy gifts and boxes curated for the woman you are and the mom you're becoming

Nurtured 9- elevated gift boxes filled with luxurious, non-toxic, and pregnancy-safe products across beauty, mind, and body designed to pamper new moms and moms-to-be

Babylist Hello Baby Box-one time welcome box for expectant moms, free when you create a registry

Hey Milestone-one-time pregnancy sample box for new moms (formerly Noobie Boxes)

Diaper
Honest-diapers, wipes and other items to build your own bundle

Hello Bello-hypoallergenic diapers, freebie with your 1st bundle

Dyper-disposable and cloth diapers, training pants

Abby&Finn- eco-friendly diapers, wipes and premium essentials, free shipping

Target-wide variety of diapers to choose from

Amazon-wide variety of diapers and baby products to choose from

MadeOf-NSF organic baby skincare and diapers (vegan, gluten-free, no GMOs and made in USA)

Parasol-natural, eco-friendly diapers and baby products (great for sensitive skin)

Bungies-one-size fits all, eco-friendly, water resistant cloth diapers

ECO by Naty-eco-friendly diapers and products

Eco Pea-highly rated, eco-friendly, hypoallergenic bamboo diapers and biodegradable bamboo wipes

Happy Little Camper-biodegradable, 100% natural diapers and wipes made with hypoallergenic cotton and contain pure and healthy ingredients good for baby’s sensitive skin

Meals, Snacks & Treats
Hungryroot-customized healthy foods and recipes

Mother Snacker-hand-picked decadent treats & beautifully designed goods to encourage, inspire & spoil moms

The Candy Club-curated selection of delectable candies delivered monthly

Nightfood-sleep-friendly snacks, great for pregnant and postpartum moms (not a subscription)

Health & Beauty
Ritual Essential Prenatal Multivitamin-prenatal with 12 key nutrients for before and during pregnancy (very popular)

Perelel Health Vitamins & Supplements-the first & only OB/GYN-founded prenatal vitamin (women's and men's supplements, preconception, fertility, pregnancy postpartum support)

The Detox Box-skincare, makeup, body, hair and general wellness supplements and products

Beauty Heroes-quality, full sized clean beauty products

Fashion
Stitch Fix Maternity-personalized maternity clothing by trimester (no subscription required)

Le Tote Maternity-maternity clothing for rent with option to keep at a discounted price

Family

The Rad Dad-box for new dads

Bitsy Boxes-monthly delivery of products tailored to your child age 0-3 years old (monthly and annual pricing)

Moms + Babes Box-essentials for baby and must-haves for mom delivered seasonally

Postpartum

Cater to Mom-boxes with 5 -7 full-sized, hand-picked postpartum care essentials to support the postpartum journey

Birth in Color RVA-doula curated box that caters to the needs of parents during the fourth trimester. boxes include postpartum recovery essentials, beauty or bath products, teas, healthy snacks, books, self care tips and helpful care resources. Each box contains 6-8 items.

MOMBOX-custom care kits for new moms

Sunflower Motherhood-boxes to help support women throughout pregnancy and motherhood (products and apparel)

Dollar Maxi Pad-products and supplies to support healing and recovery in the fourth trimester

Breastfeeding

Cratejoy Breastfeeding Boxes-boxes that consists of items to support lactation and mom's mental wellness/self-care (quarterly and monthly options)

Other
Force of Nature-all natural household cleaners and products

Grove Collaborative-sustainable cleaning/home, personal care and wellness products

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Cesareans: Planned vs. Emergency

4/24/2023

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Tacoya Richard and Ryan Garretts moments after their daughter, Lily, was born by Gentle Cesarean.

Planning for and giving birth is usually a time of great joy and change, but it can also bring unexpected challenges and even stress. Most new mothers plan for a vaginal birth. But we know that birth is unpredictable and anything can happen. Do you know what your provider or hospital will do if your labor stalls? Are you aware of the medically necessary reasons to have a cesarean section? Do you have a plan in place if there is an emergency and you need a surgical birth?

The rates of c-sections have increased dramatically in the last 30 years. According to a 2021 study from the World Health Organization (WHO), cesarean section use continues to rise globally, accounting for more than 1 in 5 (21%) of all childbirths. This number is set to continue increasing over the coming decade, with nearly a third (29%) of all births likely to take place by cesarean section by 2030. While these numbers are alarming, the purpose of this article is to prepare for the event of a c-section.

So how can you be prepared if you need or want a c-section?

First things first: create a plan. If you are planning for a cesarean, you will still need a birth plan. It should include things like your birth team/support, what you want the birth space (OR) to look, feel and smell like, preferences on whether staff can chat during the procedure, clear or blue curtain to see (or not see) baby being born and of course, your "Golden Hour" desires. In an emergency situation, a c-section will look and feel slightly different. You will still want to put a plan in place in case your baby needs to be for emergency reasons. However, there may be restrictions or limitations to your plan in this case. And your baby may need to be taken to the NICU as well.

The biggest differences in a planned cesarean versus and an emergency cesarean will be urgency and atmosphere. These two things make a big impact on the experience. Depending on where you birth, the protocols for either scenario may vary. It is always good to ask about both options ahead of birth to ease fears and concerns. Whether you want or need a cesarean birth, you should be prepared for the OR and your fourth trimester recovery. Hiring a doula is a great way to get educated and plan for either scenario as well as help you with postpartum recovery.

Planned or Non-Emergent:

Slower pace
Birth doula and/or partner present
Spinal epidural and fully conscious
Skin-to-skin in OR
Birth photography
Choice of delayed cord clamping, lowered curtain, music playing, gentle transition for baby

Emergency:

Fast pace
No doula support generally (partner may be present)
Under general anesthesia and asleep
Delayed skin-to-skin (once you wake up, partner may be able to)
No photography
Will miss the first moments of birth and bonding
Baby may need to be taken to the NICU

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Navigating the Wonder Years

Guest Blog: Saidah Pearson, RN, IBCLC

Trusting Your Mother's Intuition & Becoming a Confident Mom

Pregnancy & Postpartum Subscription Boxes

Cesareans: Planned vs. Emergency

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