In 2006, I didn't know anything about breastfed babies, better yet seen women my age (20) nursing their babies, especially African-American women. I remember visiting Los Angeles and while on the the beach, I saw my in law's friend nursing her baby boy (he was 3 at the time). I remember looking like what is she doing?

I'm going to be honest, I didn't know milk came out the woman's breast. I remember thinking, Wow! How beautiful! I remember watching her comfort her son in a way that I wanted for my child some day. I began asking a million and one questions... How does it feel? How does the milk come in? When does the milk stop? Does he bite? Does this create a unique bond? She answered every single question. I remember thinking, could I be comfortable doing this in public?  What would people's reaction be?

I did a little research on breastfeeding when I got home and fell in love with the bonding stories a lot of the moms talked about on the blogs, and I fell in love with the health benefits. It was then that I decided that if we became pregnant I would breastfeed.

When we became pregnant with our first child, two weeks prior to my due date, I prepared my nipples. I wet a warm cloth and rubbed my nipples and massaged my breast in a circular motion to stimulate the breast. I would squeeze my nipples noticing the nodes had thick white dots (milk perhaps). My husband is going to kill me for this one, but I asked him to latch on so I could see how the baby would, more so to see if it would be painful.
 
When I delivered my baby girl, my "milk" was thick and clear, but not milk. I remember crying because I really wanted the nursing to work, but there was no milk. Three days later my breasts went from A cups to fully engorged D cups! I remember my breasts were so heavy, I couldn't wait until Nevaeh released me. When she first latched on, it did hurt essentially. But the lactation nurse came in and helped telling me, "it shouldn't hurt." Which was true! Once she latched on correctly it didn't hurt at all. However, I did contract a yeast infection from her latching on incorrectly. My daughter was biting down on my nipples and made them raw. In my mind I planned on nursing for at least one year. Nevaeh had other plans. At nine months she was done. She was introduced to table food (mashed potatoes) and rejected my milk. I really was sad. I didn't make it to a year. We decided to give her almond milk as well as cashew milk. My milk, after trying every remedy in the books and blogs, didn't dry up until two years after the fact. Overall, it went fantastic and I loved the bond we shared.

While breastfeeding my son, everything was similar until it was time to ween. Omgeeeeee!!! Can you say hell!!! He reached 12 months so I thought, okay, time to ween. He wasn't ready! We had the big move to California at 18 months which was a huge transition for him. I needed to wait until we got settled in... or so I thought. Two years old and nope, he still wasn't ready. I remember trying everything-going on trips, sleeping in another room, trying to dry up my milk, but nothing worked! He would scream bloody murder. What was it that this boy didn't want to let go of the milk? I began talking with him. "Mommy is all done", I would tell him. I remember him saying, "I want sweet warm milk". I decided to give it a couple of more weeks and that turned into another year. At 3 years and 3 weeks, I decided to go cold turkey. It took a whole week of him crying it out. I honestly wouldn't recommend this as your first choice as it was too emotional for us both. I strongly believe if I didn't ween Jo Jo cold turkey he would still be nursing. I did allow him to cuddle before bed and have "boobie time" where he would lay on my chest and after 10-15 minutes he would fall asleep. Possibly listening to my heartbeat or it's the first thing he had contact with coming out the wound. I'm not sure, but one thing is for sure, should we have another child I think I would pump and nurse at the same time. Three years is was entirely too long for me. Overall breastfeeding is beautiful and I would do it again (:

Here are some of the things I did for my milk to flow:
*Mother's Milk Tea
*Green veggies
*Tons of water
*Eating (plenty for me and baby)
*Lansinoh (cream for sore nipples)
*Warm cloth on nipples 15 mins prior to nursing
*Beer (not a full bottle, mostly the fizz helped my milk flow (:

Donchelle is due with her third child in late October. She is planning on breastfeeding, but she is not sure if she is going to pump exclusively and bottle feed or breastfeed directly. "I'm a little reserved, more so worried about the weening process because with Jo Jo it was so difficult." Donchelle, no matter what you decide, I support you!


Update as of August 29, 2017:  Breastfeeding the third time around, I most definitely have to say was a lot easier, but I had some challenging moments after going back to work. Baby girl didn't start taking the bottle until she was six months old. So driving to work three times a day for my hubby was hard, but we got through that patch. Last month I got my first cycle after having her and my milk decreased significantly. I don't know why. I was seriously only able to produce 4 oz. total after pumping for 30 minutes on both breasts. I was told it was because of my cycle. The week after, my milk supply went back up and I was pumping 8 oz. in 30 minutes. 

I'm beyond thankful for the bonding moments we share when she climbs on my lap to nurse️!

​My Breastfeeding Story: The struggles, joys and my support
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I don’t come from a family of nursing women. Or I guess I should say I wasn’t breastfed. My mom couldn’t handle the discomfort, but my oldest sister is a breastfeeding guru. All the young moms in our family (cousins, nieces, etc.) ask her for advice. She also offers advice even when you don’t ask, but it usually turns out great. So all through my pregnancy she was asking if I intended to nurse. Well needless to say I don’t think I had much choice, but it was also something I wanted to do for our child. So I asked other people too; friends who I knew liked to breastfeed, and my husband and I talked about what we wanted for our child.
 
Right out of the womb our daughter, Peyton, nursed for almost an hour, which was different and exciting. So I thought it was going to be easy… well I was wrong. Peyton was born a fantastic sleeper, which meant eating was a secondary concern for her. This meant that she wasn’t eating enough and lost nearly a pound within 4 days of being born. This was SUPER scary because she was jaundice and the Internet can make you think that this is worse than it is. So our doctor gave us newborn formula and told us to supplement.
 
I thought, “Formula…I don’t want to give her formula. I got Milk!” Well it turned out she didn’t want formula. She wouldn’t eat more than ½ and ounce no matter how much she had nursed and my milk came in at the hospital… I just didn’t know.  So instead we decided to supplement her feedings with milk. We were scared because you can never tell how much a baby eats when you are strictly nursing. So I began pumping and nursing around the clock during her first days home. Each time she nursed I followed by offering a bottle with an ounce in it OR would pump and giver her 2 oz. of milk in a bottle. We kept this up for 3 days and she gained an entire pound. She was back to her birth weight by the end of her first week.
 
After her 4-week visit, she began latching fairly well when she wanted to. I started going to a breastfeeding support group and the lactation specialist saw her latch and said she was doing fine. She said, “you see you both can do it, now its just about consistency.” That was encouraging so I kept at it. Peyton would wake to eat on somewhat of a schedule (we were using Babywise techniques) and was gaining steadily. I was able to weigh her to see how much she during support group.
I am only 2 months into this process but I plan to breastfeed for a year. I know that they say the biggest benefits are over after a few months but in my mind this is the best for our daughter. She was born 7lb 4 oz. (though some of that may have been fluid from my IV) and she was 10lbs 14 oz. at her 8 week well visit. Now she latches well and probably overeats but is gaining weight and looking great. There is no right way to do this… but this is the way we are doing it.

Update as of August 3, 2016: Ayanna is back to working full time again and her daughter attends day care. Ayanna's daughter, Peyton, is still breastfeeding at 14 months old! Once or twice a day, mom and daughter still get a few precious bonding moments through breastfeeding even though Peyton is now on soy milk during the day. Let the journey continue...

For the last few years, breastfeeding or nursing has become a widely talked about subject despite the fact that the act itself is still considered somewhat taboo in America. I wholeheartedly support breastfeeding for many reasons and since August is National Breastfeeding Awareness Month, I wanted to share my personal story.

I knew I wanted to breastfeed PAC Man before he was even born. I knew that breastfeeding would not only take my bond with my son to a higher level, but it would also keep the oxytocin flowing, help me loose the baby weight and of course, save me lots of money with not having to buy formula. I would like to say that all of these things happened and that nursing my son was a piece of cake. But it wasn’t.

The bonding happened immediately. Even before I ever nursed him. He was born on a Friday, but it wasn’t until the next day that I actually nursed him. I had been waiting for the lactation consultant to come and visit with me, but she never did. A shift nurse came to check on me and asked me how nursing was going. I told her that I hadn’t yet tried, but I wanted to. With her help, I was nursing my son in a matter of minutes! And my husband was right there supporting me :) We left the hospital and headed home a day later and that was when my milk REALLY came in! I was a bit sad though because I only had a hand pump and that got old quick. It would be another three weeks before I received my electric pump, but it was heaven sent! I did loose some of my supply simply because I couldn’t keep up with just the hand pump, but I took Fenugreek supplements and drank Mother’s Milk tea to help with my production. I know now, that had I been eating properly as well, I could have increased my supply even more.

Although I stayed home with PAC Man for nearly 8 months, I did eventually start to supplement some of his feedings with formula because the more he grew, the more he ate. And I just couldn’t keep my production up. This did give my husband more of an opportunity to feed and bond with our son as well and that was really important to me and him. I am proud to say that I nursed my son for nearly 10 months! There were some challenges, but I loved that I was able to nourish him just the same as I did when I carried him. Sadly, I stopped because he had A LOT of teeth and I wasn’t sure what to do about him biting me at the time. Today, I am much more educated on biting, weaning and breastfeeding in general. I only nursed PAC Man once or twice out in public, but I feel that every nursing mother has the right to whip out her boob and feed her child at any time. It’s one of the most natural things in the world.

What some people don’t realize everything us moms do just to keep up our milk supply because it can be gone in an instant. It really is liquid GOLD!! I know mothers that have to pump in closets, bathrooms and their cars just to make sure their babies have milk while they work. I know mothers that have been escorted out of public establishments because they chose to breastfeed in public. Nothing about being a mother is perfect, but the joy we get making our children happy is more than enough for us. We don’t need the added negativity. So cheers to all of you breastfeeding mothers out there! I support you! You know the naysayers may be mad because they don't have the ability to do it. Breastfeeding is a superpower!

Like the cool logo on my graphic above? Click on it and it will take you to Spread Shirt where you can order that t-shirt and other breastfeeding shirts like it.