I have heard this song three times in the last few days (prompting me to finish this blog post) and while I've heard is dozens of times before, it hit different this week. It was like a serious call to action.






​Back in December, one of my favorite birth workers, Sabia Wade, posted about Black Luxury and bringing it into 2021. That phrase has been ringing in my ears ever since! So what is Black Luxury?

• Quality fabrics and getting dressed just because...
• Fine dining and traveling to exotic destinations
• Making financial investments/Owning land & multiple properties
• Whole body wellness that includes estheticians, chiropractors, dentists, trainers, nutritionists, herbalists and therapists

Black Luxury is things previously denied to us; all things that raise our vibrations and feed our higher selves. Prioritizing our deepest needs to fulfill our purpose. Simply put, it's whatever you need to live the life you desire as a Black being.

Repeat after me: I can and will have all the things I want in addition to what I need. I am no longer living in survival mode-I will THRIVE in all that I do.

Sure, looking good and having a little money in your pocket are important, but I'm not talking about temporary or quick solutions. I'm talking about a lifestyle. The way we were meant to live in this world. We need to normalize Black Luxury.

• Guilt free rest
• Saying no (with no explanation)
• Outsourcing
• Asking for what you need
• Making time to enjoy hobbies and discover new ones and of course
• Getting rid of all the things (and people) that no longer serve us 
• No more people pleasing or saying yes because you don't want to "miss an opportunity"

We are walking in our God given authority and power.

We are loving and living on purpose.

We are embracing every ounce of our melanin and displaying it elegantly everywhere we go.

We will no longer accept no for an answer when we shouldn't have had to ask in the first place.

We are making our own tables to sit and eat at.

We are giving up toxic work environments and establishing legacies and generational wealth through entrepreneurship. 

We are ditching the grind, hustle and capitalism cultures and RESTING. Period.

We are relinquishing obligations and making room for new opportunities and life to happen organically.

We will travel more and explore other cultures we have influenced.

We are done with a government who treats us like second class citizens & murders us without cause or consequences when our ancestors built this country with their blood, sweat and tears.

Yes. Black Luxury is more than money and material things. It's about confidence. Influence. True, pure love. The power of the Black dollar. Owning our full identities and true selves. Manifesting a life that the history books can't lie about. Black Luxury is the cure for burnout. (Argue with me.)

How will you be incorporating Black Luxury into your life? Leave a comment below.

Happy Black History Month!

Oh, wait.... Happy New Year too!

I hope and pray everyone reading this is well and has started the new year off with new goals & intentions that will only lead to great things.

I have to be honest with you... January was a bit difficult for me. I was dealing with a couple of big disappointments from December and I was in a terrible funk. I will spare you the details because truthfully I don't need to revisit those feelings and while I am not 100% over it all, God has already dealt with my heart concerning these matters and I know that my delay is not a denial.

I began the new year with a three week fast for some spiritual insight. It was hard, especially since I was on call for three families, but the clarity I received was invaluable. I was having a difficult time moving forward with my plans and goals for this year because I was still carrying the heaviness of last year. Although, I tried to prioritize my physical & mental health in 2020, it got harder with each passing day. I realized that there was/is a lot going on around me that I cannot control and instead of backing away and taking a break to protect my peace, I developed a habit of having to know what was happening in the world at any given moment (staying informed) even when it triggers me. I definitely blame that on 45. At this point we all have PTSD from the trauma that man caused America and the world. That means we all have a pre-existing condition now, right?

If you have been following me for some time then you may know that I used to write and end-of-the-year rant aka blog airing my grievances (mostly political) from the year. But we lived and survived all 366 days of the mess that was 2020. Unfortunately, we are still dealing with it all. And some of us are dealing with even more due to the lack of action from Congress in a timely manner. My heart can't help but hurt thinking of all the families who have lost loved ones, homes, jobs and so much more in the past year. And unfortunately, the affects of what happened in 2020 will not end any time soon. It has already affected the next generation and their way life, education and health.

With all that we have endured, it only seems right that I, and maybe you too, are feeling stuck. My advice: explore those feelings and see where it leads you. Find a way to move forward, even if you have to change your daily routine. But please, do not be afraid to move forward. Fear breeds nothing, literally. Tell me the truth: are you still doing the same thing you were doing in April 2020 when quarantine first began? Have you changed anything about how you live, work or play? More importantly, is your self care routine the same? (It shouldn't be.) Yes, we as humans can be very adaptable especially when we have very little choice. But we also can't ignore our instincts and expectations to be safe and secure. Transparency: I haven't felt safe since the election. And of course my feelings only grew stronger on January 6th. This post was almost titled "Dear America, I Don't Trust You", but I had to shift my energy because I didn't want to start the new year on a negative note. But you know what I'm getting at.

So what is in store for me and Best of Both Worlds Doula Services in 2021? LOTS! But you will just have to wait and see. I will be moving a bit differently this year so I can accomplish some BIG goals and birth some new things. What exactly does that mean? I am going to be "Reclaiming My Time" as auntie Maxine Waters says. It means that I will be less available. I will purposely and unapologetically be selfish with my time. Less social media and checking in on people. I am constantly giving my time whether it is with family, clients, mentees and business colleagues. and after last year, I think about time, my time, much differently. Growth and protecting my peace are my only priorities this year. This next level will require more of me which means less everything else.

If you are feeling anything but joy and happiness right now. That is okay. That is expected. Breathe. Be open minded and ready for new opportunities and doors to open even if it's not what you expected. Trust the process and your intuition. Reclaim your time and take control of the things you can. Everything will fall into place at the right time.