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This blog was originally written by my mother, Connie Houston Kitchens and published on my Mom Blog on June 25, 2014. This was my reaction after reading it for the first time: As I read this early this morning, I cried. Even though I have heard parts of this story many, many times, it was somehow different this time. No edits. Just heartfelt words from a loving mother. Thank you mom for sharing OUR birth story!  How do you put into writing something so profound yet so loving, so real yet so shockingly unbelievable? Those are some of the emotions that rushed through my mind and body the day that I was informed that I was carrying not only one life but two. It was also the first time in my life that I was speechless for the entire day and once arriving home I just laid in bed and stared at the ceiling in awe. I was about 4 ½ months along when I discovered this amazing thing. Now please take into account that I am recounting this story after more than “twentyfine” years since it’s occurrence and while I have on many occasions replayed this story in my heart and mind, it’s like wine and/or cheese, it gets better and more appreciated as time goes into one season and out of the next! The pregnancy was sailing along and the activity in my belly was at an all time high from several months in, but I dismissed the thought of twins in the first trimester because I read somewhere that most women give thought to twins when they begin to feel movement due to the first sensations of life in their core. But let me fast forward to the end of my 7th month of pregnancy when I went to Dr. M for my monthly routine checkup. I knew that I was feeling exhausted, but I figured that it was normal or to be expected due to the multiple pregnancy. Dr. M informed me that I had to be placed in the hospital due to the onset of premature labor. I was totally unprepared for that seeing as how I was still working part time and I was caring for my five year old. However, Dr. M was animate about it. While in the hospital for a weekend Dr. M was able to stop the labor and advised me that I would be spending the duration of the pregnancy in the hospital. The thought of that depressed me so much that Dr. M devised an alternate plan. I was told that I had to stay on complete bed rest and my doctor visits would increase to 3 times per week and my five year old would have to be cared for outside of my home. But more than that, I had to leave my home to ensure that I would not do what a pregnant, restless soul would do, everything but. Until I could confirm to Dr. M that I would comply with those conditions I would not be released from the hospital so I did comply and I was threatened that if there were any remote signs that I was not complying, I would be placed back in the hospital. My brother was a head nurse at one of the major hospitals at the time and he was on a month long vacation and with Dr. M knowing him personally, it was a go. My sister cared for my five year old and the tri-weekly doctor visits were managed without any further complications of early labor in the pregnancy. There was one concern for Dr. M that was discussed during one of my visits which concerned me and it was that the babies were positioned in a “T”, meaning that the baby at the top was lying straight across while the baby at the bottom was positioned with the head down. Dr. M explained that if they remained in that position a C-section would be performed rather than allow the baby at the bottom to be born and then perform a C-section on the baby lying across the top portion of my uterus. I was concerned but I had so many things going on at that time that it was duly noted but I had bigger things pressing like where was the coolest spot in the house seeing that is was near the end of June and summer weather was in full effect! My due date was approaching and I had begin to walk with a limp because the babies had gained the weight that Dr. M was striving for and bed rest was doing the body much good. My due date was on the day of one of my visits and I was certain that Dr. M would usher me on to the hospital since we had made it to the target date or so I thought. All I got was an examination, a pat on the shoulder and an “alright now, I will see you on your next visit.” I was a bit distraught. No let’s get to the real, I was mad! I was so ready to get on with seeing the outcome of this 2 times everything going on with me and in me that I could have gone into a boxing ring and gone a few rounds, limping and all but I kept my cool because it was too hot to do anything else! After leaving Dr. M and realizing that I was still very, very, very pregnant, I stopped to the library which was across the street from my brother’s place and that proved to be a very smart and much needed move. The library was quiet and cool and during the pregnancy I read up on pregnancy but not pregnancy of multiples so I picked up a book that proved to be a life saver! The book gave me insight as to what I had gone through up to where I was in that very moment and I could not put it down. It even gave me information on the fact that my babies were not both coming “head” first which meant that I was going to succumb to a C-section of which I did not want. I spent hours reading this book and then realized that I needed to wine down for the night so I drew myself a bath and just sat in the tub with some bath oil and began to rub my babies, especially my breached baby. Dr. M had already told me where the head was located so I followed the instructions from the book and just rubbed and rubbed. When I was ready to get out of the tub and I stood up my mucus plug fell out and I realized that active labor was in progress so I proceeded to get dress for bed and eat a snack, ham and cheese with a glass of milk. Yes, I was advised not to eat or drink if I thought that I was in labor, but I consciously did so because with my first child I woke up to my water breaking and followed the rules of not eating or drinking and I was so hungry that from that day to this, I can’t think about Crunch N Munch without remembering how starved I was with that experience because that’s all I thought about. I went to bed and when I could not sleep I woke my brother, who by the way was supposed to return to work the next day from his month long vacation. When we realized that the babies were on the way we called the doctor and was advised to meet Dr. M at the hospital because Dr. M was the on-call doctor for the night and had been delivering babies all night. We arrived at the hospital a little after 4 am and I was dilated approx 4-5 centimeters. I was very exhausted and wanted to sleep mostly. Dr. M came by to see me and gave me an update on my progress but I was sent to x-rays to get a clear picture as to what positions the babies were in so that it would be determined whether I would have to have the C-section or not. Dr. M was happy to report that both the babies were positioned “head” first so I was sent back to labor and delivery with some crazy amazement that I was being spared a Cesarean section and the reading and time in the bath tub paid off! As the contractions got stronger I began to get super uncomfortable and Dr. M was nearing the end of the shift. It was now about 7:30 a.m. and Dr. M advised me to move it along because she really wanted to deliver the babies but was super exhausted and might have to turn my delivery over to the next on-call doctor. While I remained at 6 centimeters for hours my water would not break. The contractions were very intense and all I could do was grab the bed post and breath. Surprised to see Dr. M walking in my room about 9:40 a.m., I was advised that a tool would be used to aid in breaking my water and that was all I needed. Within 15 minutes I had reached 10 centimeters and was being wheeled to delivery. Baby girl “A” was born at 10:06 a.m. and as I laid on the delivery table, Dr. M advised that as I felt another pain to push, but everything seemed to stop with my contractions. I could hear breached baby’s heart beating so I was not so worried, but I was still being advised by Dr. M to push. After about 5 minutes of that Dr. M proceeded to have the nurse inject my IV with medication that would start up my contractions again and it worked. Breached baby began to trickle down and I felt her water break and she had arrived at 10:21 a.m. and Dr. M advised me to look over at her on the cleaning table and pointed out to me that due to her posture, she had been breached the entire pregnancy because she never cradled but laid straight out. At that moment I was so happy that I began to cry tears of joy because the girls were healthy and whole! Dr. M was so proud of our accomplishment that the girls were cleaned up, wrapped up and paraded around the immediate floor and nurse’s station. That was the very first sign that they were the future queens of my life for the world to see that they wear beauty as garments of glory! My breached baby is your Best of Both Worlds blogger and she makes me proud everyday as does her twin sister. If I had to pick them first hand, I could not have selected anywhere near the precious blessings I have been given! Happy Birthday Beautiful Girls! You both have brought so much joy and peace to my life and I am very proud of the twentyfine women that you are today and will continue to be throughout your lives! Now I know how to put into writing something so profound yet loving, something so shockingly unbelievable yet so very real. These are some of the emotions that still rush through my mind and my body when I think about two of the most beautiful flowers that could have bloomed out of me!   
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This blog post was originally published on my Mom Blog on June 12, 2013. For as long as I can remember, my husband has always complained about how men are always slighted. The men’s section at Target and all the other stores we frequent are significantly smaller than the women and girl’s sections. Products and advertisements are mostly geared towards women and I guess for good reason-we like to shop! And just in case you hadn’t noticed, we women really do run the world (as Beyonce’ so hypely stated). But have we come so far that men are no longer out in front? No longer the head of the household? It’s true that we as wives and mothers take on the household duties and then some, but why does the world around us now downplay the significant role of today’s husband and father? As we all know, the family dynamic has changed dramatically over the last decade. Mostly because of the financial strain that American families have felt since the Bush Administration decided to make our lives hell. Women bringing home the bacon and stay at home dads who cook it (mmmm, bacon!) is a clear picture of the new normal. We have essentially changed the way we raise our families. So why is it so hard for us to acknowledge our men and the sacrifices they make on a daily basis? Being a full time nanny is a great career for me. But I have experienced some rough patches during my career as well. There have been a few times when I was out of work and my husband was the sole breadwinner. He even wholeheartedly supported me staying at home with our son for the first 8 months of his life. It was tough, but he never once asked me about going back to work. He has made so many sacrifices for our family and he never complains. He cooks, he kills spiders, he takes care of the lawn and maintains the mechanics of our house and car. He even decided to reduce his hours at his job last year so he could spend more time at home with our son. A job where he is only one of two men and it demands his full attention to other children and families all day long. Some days I find myself in awe of the man who never saw himself with a wife and children. And no matter what may come up, he always assures me that every thing will be fine. And it always is. He is a great husband and an awesome father and nothing is more important to him than his family. I have learned in our 9 years together that he really will do anything for me. Truth be told, my husband has never told me no. To anything. Even if he was upset with me. He truly is heaven sent. I thank God every day that he made me a woman. Having that “I can do anything" mindset is the greatest feeling. But knowing that I don’t have to do it all on my own because I have a true partner in my husband is priceless. He is the reason I dream as big as I do. He is the reason I laugh til I cry. He is the reason I love as purely as I do. He fulfills me in ways I never thought I could be fulfilled in this life. While I’m all for women ‘ruling the world’, let’s not forget our strong men who make sacrifices and willingly step aside so that we can shine a little brighter :-) Thank you to all the men that selflessly make life easier and more enjoyable for us women! They deserve some extra racks in Target, right? Happy Father's Day to all of the men and dads that love and support their families as they should!       A year ago today, I walked into Warlock's and proceeded to get my third tattoo. It was exactly one day after my twin sister left for Comoros to start her two year journey with the Peace Corps. As a new doula, I was in transition in my life. I had just started my business and I was just a couple of weeks away from turning thirty years old. I was emotional to say the least. I was both excited and nervous about where my life was headed. I questioned whether I had made the right decision to leave my nanny career behind to do and be more as a doula. I worried about how the bills would be paid if I didn't have clients right away. I was frantic about whether or not I could balance being an entrepreneur while still being an attentive wife and mother. So after months and months of thinking about it, I decided I was going to go for it and get my tattoo. Satis in Latin means 'enough'. I still remember when I found this tattoo while browsing Pinterest. The simplicity and meaning spoke to me. Even while being unsure about what my future looked like, I was hopeful. I could look around and be thankful for everything that I had and the life that my husband and I had built and continue to build today. I always say that God wakes me up every morning to do something. Even if it is just to feed, love and pray for my family. Some days are busier than others. Some days are hard and stressful. Some days are glorious and make me excited for the future. When I think about all of the things I have been through in my life, I am grateful for the good, the bad, the comical, the gut-wrenching, the heartbreak and the triumph. All of these things have made me the woman I am. All of these things have contributed to the love I have for life. And not just my life, the life of my family, friends, neighbors and especially the lives of the families I work with. I now know that I am exactly who I was meant to be. I don't have to compete with other doulas. I want to work with them and show the world that our profession is essential to the core of life itself. I don't have to compare myself to other entrepreneurs because this is my journey and my story. I don't have to compare myself to other wives and moms because we are all trying to do the same thing: raise our families with unconditional love and establishing a legacy that is worthy of the history books. I know with confidence that I am enough. And on the days when I am overwhelmed and overworked, I will be reminded of this by my tattoo. Below is the photo I took after getting my tattoo and the meaning behind it.  |
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