QOTD: How's Your Quality of Life?

August is National Wellness Month and if you know me, then you already know that wellness is a top priority for me, personally and professionally. Recently, I made some much needed changes to my health and wellness routine. Last month I relaunched my fitness brand and Fitness Momshell 2.0 has been in full effect for a few weeks. I love being back on the dance floor, getting low and sweating with my students! I had a couple of "hiccups" in July, but I'm focused and ready to meet my August goals.

I made a major change in the Spring that has completely improved my quality of life in a major way. Because of my endometriosis, I folow a strict health and wellness regime (most days). Back in April, I had major oral surgery and without going into detail, it was a long, intense recovery. Four months later and I still can't eat apples. I lost almost 12 pounds during the first week of my recovery because I couldn't eat or swallow. Turns out, the surgery was a blessing in disguise. A total "reset" if you will.

Physically, I struggled. Not eating was just the beginning. I basically had to learn how to eat again. I still have a hard time with some foods, especially meat. My relationship with food has changed for the better (I had terrible eating habits during quarantine) and I think I have finally kicked this sweet tooth... I think.

After all I went through to get this surgery (that's a crazy long story for another time) and all the pain I endured during my healing and recovery, I promised myself that I was going put my health and wellness first from now on. No more sweets or wine. Period. With that wasted money, I created my "Wellness Budget" which now goes towards my supplements and wellness product purchases. Instead of consuming empty calories that make me sick, I am feeding and healing my body with some amazing herbs & holistic products. I made a clear cut decision and a commitment and I am happy to report: so far, so good.

I have also invested more time into my mental and spiritual wellness. I have also been spending a great deal of time reading the Bible for understanding and listening to sermons. This is a big part of my self care routine now as it helps to keep me focused and lifted. Staying positive is important with so much going in globally right now.

I know with the virus still lingering, there are those worried about what work and life will look like for the rest of the year and even beyond. Now is not the time to worry or fret. Do whatever you need to do to be and live. Invest in your health. You're worth it.

Earlier this month, my family and I traveled for the first time in nearly two years. Needless to say, packing seemed to be a daunting task as I now have so many things that I need on a daily baisis. Supplements, particular foods & snacks, not to mention my most needed "go-to" items when pain comes and/or I have an endo flare. I couldn't very well leave all of my comforts of home at home, right? And don't even get me started on all the extra sanitation that was needed while traveling. I had to be prepared. Today, I am going to give you a peak inside my wellness kit as National Wellness Month begins tomorrow.

It has taken me a lot of time and energy to determine what works best for me when it comes to my health regimen. Mostly due to the fact that I have had to adjust and (at times) completely change my regimen altogether with the advice of my doctors. Here's what I know for sure: sugar and red meat are most definitely my flare triggers. Cheat days do not exist for me. I do, however, give myself permission to satisfy a craving or two during the week of my cycle. But having a consistent health regimen gives me the room to do that. Below you will find my daily supplements and meds as well as the things I use if I do experience pain or a flare:
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• ​Semaine PMS & Period Support capsules (use code ENDODOULA for a discount on your 1st order)
• ENTouch Womb Herbal Detox capsules
• AZO Cranberry supplements
• vH essentials Probiotics with Prebiotics and Cranberry Feminine Health supplements
• Spring Valley Extra Strength Probiotics
• Norethindrone (prescription)
• Goli Nutrition Ashwagandha Gummy
• Kush Queen CBD Bath Bomb
• Highland's Bioplasma Cell Salt tablets
• Lilas Pain Relief Patches
• AUVON Rechargeable Tens Unit Musce Stimulator
• Hot Water Bottle
• Dr. Teals Lavendar Bubble Bath, Epsom Salt & Body Oil (not pictured)

All of these things have improved my daily life in so many ways. I have learned that true wellness is a daily habit and there are no short cuts. It may seem like a lot to priortize your health ad wellness (especially when traveling), but in this day and age, it could mean the difference between life and death. Which one are you choosing?

Want to know how I got to this point? The journey wasn't easy, but you can read more here and here.

It's been two years since I was diagnosed with endometriosis. A lot has changed for me since first sharing my journey. And while I am seemingly managing my pain and symptoms better, I am always learning something new about endometriosis and how it is affecting me and my body on a daily basis.

If you don't know, endometriosis is a disorder in which tissue that normally lines the uterus grows outside the uterus causing chronic, debilitating pain and menstrual irregularities. Endometriosis affects 1 in 10 women during their reproductive years and there is currently no cure (not even surgery). That is about 176 million women worldwide. Because endometriosis is a full body disease, it has the potential to spread to other places in the body outside of the reproductive organs such as the chest cavity, lungs, liver, kidneys, bladder and bowels. Many people don't know that there are different types of endo and there are four different stages (I-minimal, II-mild, III-moderate, and IV-severe).

So two years after my diagnosis, what's changed?

My daily life: Overall, my daily life has improved drastically. New meds and adjusting my health regimen again reduced my pain a lot and I am so grateful for this stage of my journey. My brain fog has also decreased which has been such a relief. Last year, business picked up for me drastically which meant more clients. I was worried I wouldn't be able to keep up since I am a solo doula. Even with a backup doula, I was working all the time. Not to mention my part time job. The community center where I teach my Zumba classes closed the building for over a year so I wasn't teaching classes, but my body was still taxed due to stress and pandemic restrictions. I just started teaching again a few weeks ago and it has been great for my mental health and my body is adjusting well too.

My physical health: I have more good days than bad days now. I have changed my diet yet again (surprise surprise). I started pelvic floor therapy a few months ago after being on the waitlist for 8 months, but that was short lived due to scheduling and my extensive dental surgery so I am going to start again in the Fall. The great news is that my endo flares and bad days are few and far between now. Y'all, I can sleep again!!! And of course that has led to me having more energy and time to do all the things. Never could I imagine getting up with the sun after a good night's sleep with endo. But here I am. There are days when I know I need to slow down and rest because I know the signs.

My mental health: I spent a lot of time last year focusing on my mental health for various reasons. I created my Black Tea IG Live series to have a safe space to talk to with others about Black issues, family, life, love, entrepreneurship and health. I have also been writing and praying more which always helps me release and refocus. My walk with God has been very comforting during the highs and lows of this past year. Especially when I have felt the loneliness of this disease. Since my diagnosis, my self care has been a top priority and it entails all of these things.

New revelation: After learning about sciatic endometriosis earlier this year, I believe that I may have this type of endometriosis. I'm looking more into it while I search for the best endometriosis specialist closest to me (Endo specialists are scarce and some individuals have to cross state lines just to find one). Sadly, I am also looking for a new doctor. Dr. Summers was amazing and most importantly, she listened to me. But I was notified in March that she was going on medical indefinitely.

New products: I have been embracing holistic options more and more these days. I take herbal supplements, prebiotics and probiotics daily now instead of countless ibuprofen which I know has made me healthier internally. Last October, I ditched my NuvaRing for Norethindrone at the suggestion of my doctor. She had suggested it months earlier, but I finally decided to give it a try. Not only did it balance my hormones (my estrogen dominance was very real), it reduced my pain by 90%! I went from having pain 5 days a week to maybe once a week. In April, I started taking ENtouch supplements created by my friend and fellow endo warrior, Samantha Denae. They have helped me so much! I am planning to post a full review of the capsules soon. The also recently started using Lilas Wellness pain patches which have been so helpful for my sciatic, hip and back pain caused by my endo. The other day I finally picked up some Semaine supplements from Target and I can't wait to try them.

New considerations: If I'm being honest, I feel like my nervous system needs a total reset and I'm trying to figure out how to best do that. I have been looking into non-traditional treatment options like acupuncture, sound therapy, reiki, womb massage and regular chiropractor visits. I know that I said before that I do not want to have another surgery after the long recovery from my myomectomy. But due to the fact that I have tried nearly everything under the sun to reduce my pain and heal my endo holistically, I am not seeing the results I thought I would at this point. So, I have put surgery back on the table as a treatment option. Is this ideal for me? Absolutely not. But if you know anything about endo then you know that an official diagnosis can only come from surgery. And Lord knows the worse thing that could do is have another surgery just for the surgeon to tell me they didn't find anything (I have heard stories and this is a real fear for many who believe they have endometriosis).

Earlier this year, I became an Endo Black Ambassador. I am responsible for raising awareness about endometriosis and sharing my personal experiences while living with this disease. I have found so much comfort in the Endo Black community because we all have similar stories & experiences that we each can relate to on a deep level. As always, I am working on collaborations and partnerships with other endo warriors as well as some businesses & organizations to continue to spread awareness, increase research & studies and hopefully get some disability legislation passed for those of us with endometriosis and other chronic diseases and illnesses. We deserve more care and support and we will fight for it just like we fight to have normal lives while living with endo. If you would like to collaborate, please feel free to contact me.

June 5, 2020

This has been on my heart for months now. And with everything happening over the last couple of weeks, I need to get this off my chest.

I first new my endo was real....

Almost three years ago, I woke up in pain and stayed in bed all day. I could barely move. Months earlier I had been diagnosed with IBS, but I knew this was something else. I was experiencing another flare and none of the 8 medications I was taking relieved my pain. The sun was going down and I had been trying to get out of bed all day, at least for a little bit, to go grocery shopping. But I just couldnt. So I narrowed down the list and I only needed one thing: milk for my son. I eventually broke down and asked my husband to run to the store. He happily obliged, asked if I needed anything and he took our son with him to Target since none of us had been out that day.

I stayed home with my mom (who had moved in with is just a couple of months prior due to her failing health) and tried to breath through the pain. I managed to doze off for a few minutes and then I heard my phone ring. (Note: for our whole relationship I have consistently missed my husband's calls because when I'm at home, I put my phone on silent. But I had recently started turning my phone volume up whenever he left the house because he always calls for one reason or another).

When I answered the phone I heard my husband's voice and I immediately knew something was wrong. He told me he had been pulled over for no reason. He told me that the officer had a warrant for his arrest. He had me on speaker so I could hear. Him and the officer had an exchange when my husband asked why he had been pulled over and what the warrant was for. Then my husband and I got disconnected. (He apparently called 911 right after this so he could have a record of what was happening). I immediately jumped on my feet, grabbed some clothes, called my neighbor and asked her to take me to my husband and son.

By the time we got in the car, my husband had called back and told me he was about to be arrested. I could hear my son crying in the background. My adrenaline was pumping through me as I was now in a panic. That 9 minute car ride was the longest car ride of my life. I stayed on the phone. I put him on speaker phone so I could hear everything.

When we arrived my husband was in the back of a police SUV. A second officer had arrived at some point and was standing next to our family car just watching my son cry his eyes out. I ran over to the SUV and saw the pain in my husband's eyes. He said he was okay and told me to go get our son and told me not to cry. I walked over to our car and proceeded to calm our son down. My mother stayed with him while I spoke to one of the police officers about what was going to happen next. My heart was pounding but I spoke calmly and nodded my head before getting into my car and following the police officers to the jail.

My neighbor took my mother and son home and I proceeded down the dark highway with tears streaming down face. It seemed like a long drive. The next thing I remember is walking through the huge doors of the building and approaching the metal detector. I was then directed to go down the stairs and wait to speak to the magistrate. I had no idea who that was or what that meant. But as a young black woman who was waiting to bail her black husband our of jail, there was a sense that I did know and was even familiar with the entire process due to the color of my skin. I was not. I was scared. No, terrified. I was cold, hungry and tired. And now, I was alone. Waiting. Not knowing what was happening to my husband. Two hours pasted. I finally saw the magistrate. She spoke fast and again, she spoke to me as if I had been through this process before. I didn't even know where to begin to find a bail bondsman. I called a family friend (an older white woman) and without hesitation, she came to sit with me for a while. She waited at the jail just in case there were any updates about my husband while I went to the atm to get bail money. Money we had just put in our savings account. Money we needed. Money I was thankful to have at a time like this.

When I returned, I was told that my husband was being released soon. I waited another 40 minutes before I saw him slowly walk over to me. There was something in his eyes... He was defeated. He was angry. He was sad. I noticed that he was carrying his shoe strings. We hugged for a long time. I don't remember the ride home. It was after 2 am when we finally got home. He had bruises from the handcuffs. They served as reminders days after the whole ordeal. He made a video of his experience and his feelings about being wrongfully arrested before we went to bed. I barely slept. My body had just experienced a full on traumatic experience while I was in the middle of an endo flare. There are no words to express what my body and brain endured that day and the months following. This was the day I knew my endo was real.