Raise your hand if you are secretly (or not-so-secretly) freaking out about school?

I get it and I understand completely. At some point early this morning, I turned over and almost jumped out of bed thinking that today was the day. Thankfully, we still have one week until school officially starts in the Collins household.

Once again, Summer has magically flown by and will soon become a distant memory as school starts all over the country in the next few weeks. Some schools have already begun classes and while I have so many feelings about school and the American education system, I won't drag you down with all my thoughts about that right now. Yes, I whole-heartedly understand that there are families that don't have the necessary resources for virtual school and frontline workers who clearly need child care, but no child's life is worth the risk of sending them to an unsafe school environment right now.

Now if you know me, then you probably know that my son is homeschooled and has been for a few years now. Next week he will start fourth grade and we are ready. We have all of his books and materials, his homeroom teacher called today to check in and we have received emails from his advisor, counselor and the principal welcoming us back.

Over the years, I have shared our experience with family and friends who have wondered how my husband and I balance our careers and family life and honestly, virtual (home) school has a lot to do with it. Today I'm going to share my/our virtual school experience as well as some local education and child care resources for your convenience.

The K-12 Program
The K12 program offers tuition-free public school (and tuition based private school) options that meet your student where they are and gives your family the room and flexibility for online, at home educational instruction. With state-certified teachers, the support and structure of a school community, and online curriculum, students learn in the way that's right for them and at their own pace. For twenty years, K12 has served over one million students and has expanded to over 29 states and D.C. Additionally, K12 offers special education services, online live tutoring, summer school courses & programs, career readiness assistance and adult education programs. Individuals also have the option to supplement their own homeschool curriculum with specific K12 courses.

Why virtual school?
Virtual school provides the flexibility and convenience of working with your student and their teacher directly for a more personal learning experience and comfortable environment. Parents are able to get up close and personal with the curriculum and adapt the school day based on how their child learns. It also allows families with non traditional schedules and routines to frame their day as they see fit.

North Carolina Virtual Academy (NCVA)
North Carolina Virtual Academy is an online public charter school in North Carolina and one of many K12 schools throughout the states. My son has been attending NCVA for four years now and it has been a great experience for our entire family. Not only has it allowed my husband and I to work both in and out of the home when needed, it has given us the opportunity to see our son's learning strengths and weaknesses and integrate specific resources into his daily learning. We are able to challenge him in certain areas and give him extra attention in others.

My son really enjoys being able to participate in his weekly class meetings and complete is coursework throughout the day at his leisure. Most days we start with class meetings and then we move into coursework. In between subjects we do yoga, listen to music, watch YouTube videos, water the plants, play outside and more. Mixing the day up keeps learning fun and interesting. We've had a few hiccups over the years, but it has allowed us to create the lifestyle we want for our family. Overall, we have been pleased with the curriculum and pleasantly surprised with the balance of both modern and traditional leaning methods.

What to expect
Contact K12 for more information about schools in your area. Please be advised that although the particular school you choose may have a waiting list, you will be contacted when space opens up. You can enroll and accept a space even if it is in the middle of the school year.

Once enrolled, you can expect consistent communication from your K12 school staff to ensure your child's success. All materials including a laptop, printer, books, teacher guides and curriculum materials are mailed to your home, free of charge.

While there is a standard curriculum, parents or learning coaches have the flexibility to tailor instruction based on how their child learns. Students will have a full team that includes a homeroom teacher, advisor, counselor and learning coach (the parent) for guidance, resources and solutions.

The majority of daily lessons are online and school can be done anywhere that WiFi is available for your convenience. Parents of younger students will need to be available to help them navigate lessons and live class meetings with teachers. Older students should be able to do a lot of coursework on their own, with occasional help.

The K12 app is a great way to keep up with your students daily and weekly lessons and attendance on the go. Tech support is available for any issues that may arise with the OLS (online learning system). Parents and students will also have access to more learning tools and resources throughout the year to supplement the curriculum as well as online clubs and extracurricular activities.

If you are thinking about virtual school, K12 is a great place to start! Contact them for a full overview of all that they have to offer.

Other Resources
Below is a list of local resources including nannies & sitters, preschools, tutors & test prep and more.

WakeEd Partnership
Kim Keith
An academic childcare collaborative
kim.keith@ymcatriangle.org

The Nurtured Nest
Kathryn Dunn, owner
Virtual Preschool & Family Support Services
Kathryn@theNurturedNestNC.com

Kreative Kidz NC
Brenda Atiya Kithcart, owner
Childcare Center
kreativekidznc@gmail.com

Greater Promise Elite Learning
Steven Harrison, owner
Tutoring, Learning Center
elitelearning2015@gmail.com

One of One Educational Services
Tenica Williams, owner
Tutor/Teacher
oneofoneeducation@gmail.com

APlus Test Prep
Test Prep/Tutoring
aplus@aplushigherscores.com

Select Sitters
Kara Varnell, owner
Nanny/Sitter Placement
info@theselectsitters.com

Benita the Babysitter
Benita Edgerton, owner
Teacher/Tutor/Sitter (Virtual & In-Person)
benitathebabysitter@gmail.com

Carrie Cook, MA CCC-SLP
Virtual Speech Pathology Services
carrie.slp@gmail.com

Serfancia Starr
Childcare (In home in Durham. NC)
phl2slu@gmail.com
Available now until April 2020

Kala Hinnant
K-12 Tutor, Virtual Services
kala.hinnat@gmail.com
Availability M-F, 8-11 am

Triangle Nannies & Babysitters (Facebook Group)

Wake County Babysitters/Nannies (Facebook Group)

Wake/Raleigh Area Babysitters & Nannies (Facebook Group)

NCDPI Resources for Parents & Teachers

NC School Aid (search for resources OR upload your own resource or business)

July is Fibroid Awareness Month and I am so excited to have fellow entrepreneur Asha Dickens as my guest blogger this week! If you remember, I featured Asha and her exceptional wellness teas & herbs in my Yoni Steaming & Womb Wellness Specialist blog in March. Asha is another one of my "internet cousins" (someone I instantly connected with online) and after trying her products and learning more about her, I knew I had to have her as a guest blogger to share her story and some valuable information. Later this week, Asha and I will be LIVE on IG to discuss our journeys more.

1. Give me some background information ­on yourself and your business.

My name is Asha Dickens and I own October Lotus. October Lotus is a holistic healing company that, at the moment, offers both Reiki services (sessions and attunements) and healing herbal formulas in the form of yoni steams and drinkable herbal teas for reproductive wellness.

2. What made you decide to become a entrepreneur? How did you get into your work?

After rupturing cysts on my ovaries twice in the span of 5 months in 2016, I was diagnosed with endometriosis. It also happened to be one of the most challenging years of my life on all fronts, my health, family health, relationship, career. After my laparoscopic surgery, my doctor suggested I begin taking birth control to prevent ovulation & thus, reduce the likelihood of cysts forming on my ovaries. That option didn't sit well with me but it was the only option I was given. I tried it & immediately knew that was a bad choice. I began researching holistic ways to ease or prevent my symptoms. Someone suggested I try Reiki to ease my symptoms. During this time I also discovered yoni steaming & quickly got off of birth control. I began using simple herbal recipes I found online. My discomfort was greatly reduced. I began to learn more about herbs & endometriosis. I started thinking it was possible herbs could possibly resolve some of the suspected causes of endometriosis. I enrolled in an herbology course & educated myself then created a formula for endometriosis & fibroids. The results were great. No more ruptured cysts, & according to my ultrasounds, my fibroids shrank. I also fell in love with Reiki & decided to get my own attunement to become a Reiki practitioner.

During all of this I quit my job. I worked a very high stress job in advertising for 11 years at that point. I was burned out, unhappy & at the beginning of a spiritual awakening. My plan was to quit in October, take the remainder of the year off & figure out my next move in January. Well that didn't happen. I quit in August & never went back to a full time job. I became a full time entrepreneur. I started an advertising agency with two friends/colleagues. I was still making my herbal blends for family & friends & they loved it. I decided to also launch October Lotus & the rest is history.

3. Please share your endo/chronic illness story (as much or as little as you'd like).

My endo diagnosis caught me completely by surprise. I had literally no indicators that there was something wrong. My periods were mild & "regular", no painful cramps, urination or otherwise. Then Memorial Day 1996 I woke up with a horrendous hangover (& I'd only had 2 drinks the night before). As I was getting ready to go to a family BBQ I was hit with the worst cramps I'd ever experienced in my life. It was hard for me to move. I got to my aunt's house & felt miserable. It was hot outside but I felt like I was overheating. Then I passed out. That was my first ruptured cyst. 5 months later I repeated the cycle, but I knew what to expect so I wasn't caught off guard in the same way. But from that moment I knew I couldn't experience that again. I've ruptured a cyst once since 2016 and that was last year. It was because I stopped my regimen of yoni steaming & tea.

4. What were the best & hardest parts of starting your business, both personally and professionally?

The best part of starting my business was doing something I really love & enjoy. I felt so good about the idea of helping women. I knew how my body responded to Reiki & herbs & I really wanted to share that with the world. It dawned on me that this work is really my purpose. In 2015 I'd had an intuitive reading with my friend & mentor Jamila White & she told me she saw me working with herbs & women. That just sounded like nonsense to me at the time, but after I created October Lotus, I remembered what she'd said. That further confirmed I was living out my purpose. When you realize that, it makes things just a little easier because you do everything out of love.

There were two things I found difficult about starting my business. The first was that while I knew not to expect success out the gate, I didn't think it would take quite so long to see results. I was so naive thinking that just because I built it people would come. LOL!! As if people were just sitting around waiting for me to launch my business. Treating October Lotus like a real business & not just a gift was a difficult transition, although I knew how to do that.

The other difficult piece is that I suffered (& still do to a degree) from imposter syndrome. You question yourself a lot with every step of your business. When things were moving slow, the thoughts were, 'is this even a business? Is this really a product people want? You're a marketer, not a healer." When those thoughts start to get stronger, without fail, someone says something to encourage me. Whether it's a message I read that seems to be for me, or a compliment from a client, a message from my ancestors, they all help me snap out of that doubt.

5. What did you learn about yourself an­d your support system while studying/training and starting your business?

I have an amazing support system. I knew I had an amazing family & great friends, but understanding that you also truly have folks that support you is priceless. I learned that I had more support than I thought. When I left my career I assumed people would think I was crazy. I also had a hard time releasing my previous career, which was my own issue. The people in my life embraced my business. They encouraged me to move forward & to execute my idea. Those friends & family who'd tried my herbal blends reminded me constantly that I have a quality product & not to give up. Through this process I learned that I couldn't ignore my purpose any longer. I am a healer. I learned that entrepreneurship is difficult, but I am supported both physically & spiritually. My faith has been tested many times, but I've learned that when you are doing the work you are meant to do, you will always be fine.

6. What is your niche? What defines and separates your brand and business from others?

There are two components of my business. There's the womb wellness aspect & the Reiki Master aspect. My niche is ultimately people who are seeking alternative, more spiritually based ways of healing. I offer Usui Reiki to both men & women. My womb wellness products & sacral chakra related energetic healing sessions are for women. I enjoy supporting women. I love being able to provide a natural alternative for our healing. My brand is different from other Yoni Steams & herbal teas in that October Lotus focuses specifically on reproductive challenges. Each of my formulas were developed with the symptoms & causes of specific issues in mind. I developed each blend to individually combat issues like endometriosis, fibroids, ovarian cysts, dysmenorrhea (cramps), fertility support, PMS/Menopause symptoms, menorrhagia (heavy cycle) & general detoxification.

7. Where do you see your business in 5 ­years?

In five years I see myself operating a fully functional wellness business. My goal is to increase my offerings. My desire is for October Lotus to be offered at wholesale in health food stores or to alternative health care practitioners. I will continue to offer Reiki sessions & attunements, but likely on the more limited basis. I will begin working on my Doula certification in mid-August, which I would like to incorporate as another part of my support for women throughout the reproduction lifespan. Lastly I would like to be able to offer herbs beyond womb wellness products, but for other health issues. I'd like for my business to operate as an apothecary.

8. What advice do you have for any entrepreneurs looking to start/revamp their bu­siness or change careers?

I have 3 pieces of advice for entrepreneurs:
- Have faith. Do not give up. The pull to give up will be so strong, but don't listen to that, unless you have a really good reason to quit. It will not be easy, but do not give up!
- Befriend other entrepreneurs. You will need them to bounce ideas off of, to support you & sometimes commiserate with you. But you will need someone around you who can relate to what you are dealing with & can offer you support.
- Be very clear about your business. Know what you offer, why it is necessary & the industry or category your business falls in. You should clearly understand the industry your business is in. Be aware of the advancements & happenings in the industry. Ensure that you are clear on how you will make a profit, while also providing the best products/service possible. But please know your business & make plans for the future.

9. Who do you look up to or admire in the womb health and wellness community?

I admire so many women in this space. There are three that I will highlight here:
- Queen Afua. She isn't specifically a womb wellness practitioner but she is one of the first women who helped me understand the connection between our emotional body & our physical body. I love her dedication to helping women, Black women, move beyond our traumas toward overall physical & mental health.
- Beatrice Dixon. While I don't know her personally, I love her story & her products. Beatrice Dixon owns & operates the brand The Honey Pot Co. She began her business after suffering nearly a year with BV. Her ancestor gave her the formula for her products & thus began The Honey Pot. I love this story. It reminds me a tiny bit of myself. I know my work is ancestral & spiritually led. I love that she acknowledges this side of herself & incorporates it into her business & products.
- Lauren Kornegay. Lauren is the founder of the non-profit Endo Black. I just love what she is doing in this space as an educator & resource for women with endo. She is so dedicated to this work, it's motivating. She's also really kind & helpful. But I so admire her advocacy for women with endo.

10. Tell me about your most recent "business wi­n."

My most recent business win is probably not what one would consider a "win" per se. But for me, wins look like accomplishing my goals. I received my Reiki Master attunement earlier this year, which has helped me tap into more of my intuition & healing ability. In August I will be taking the workshop which kicks-off my Doula certification. I'm really excited about those things & what happens next!

Black Tea IG Live Chat Part I
Black Tea IG Live Chat Part II

THE TEA IS BREWING!

Who wants some?

BLACK TEA was an idea that came to me a couple of weeks ago. It was a cross between a need for me to connect with my people in the age of COVID-19 & social injustice and also create a space for black folx to share, explore, learn, grow, heal, be inspired and just be. My first three interviews weren't actually from my account because I have been having Instagram tech issues for months. But things are working well now so I'm not wasting any time!

Who can be a guest?
I'm looking for black and brown:

• birth workers
• doctors
• nurses
• reproductive health specialists
• parents
• ​teachers
• child & family care givers
• social workers
• mental health counselors & therapists
• holistic health practitioners & experts
• maternal health & reproductive justice advocates
• artists/creators
• entrepreneurs & more

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Generally, the chats have covered the guests' business/expertise, family/life in the age of C-19, mental health and the current social & political climate. It is a very informal and "go with the flow" type of interview.

I am looking forward to catching up with old friends, getting to know new ones and sharing our stories of success, struggle, pain, purpose, business, blackness and everything in between! I hope to provide open and honest conversations filled with comfort, hope, knowledge, connection and positive energy exchanges.

I can tell from the reactions to the invites I've sent to potential guests that these chats will be very necessary. It is important that we take the time to express our feelings and be able to do so in a safe space. I couldn't be more excited about what's in store and what will transpire.

Now more than ever we need more black spaces to share our own stories and connect with one another and I'm happy to be a facilitator.

If you are interested in being a Black Tea guest to share your story, experience and/or professional expertise, please email me at bestofbothworldsnc@gmail.com with subject line Black Tea Guest.
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BLACK TEA SPONSORS!
​If you are a tea brand who would like to sponsor gifts for my guests and giveaways for my followers, please reach out to me. I would love to promote your products and accesories. Black owned and BLM supporters preferred.

Click here to view Black Tea IG Live Chats!

*Sigh*
*Deep Breath In, Deep Breath Out*

So, you may already know what this blog is going to be about.

Yes. My Blackness. My Life. My Worthiness. My Broken Heart. My Rage. My Exhausted Body, Mind & Soul.

Growing up, I lived in such a diverse, middle class neighborhood and I had friends from all different cultures and backgrounds. I kind of knew what it meant to live in the south, but I wouldn't really know until I became a teenager. I saw things. I saw injustice. But it was just something that you dealt with, not spoke on. Especially as a young person (be seen, not heard). The only talks about race I ever remember having was when my mother and father spoke to me about friends and dating... always stating that you can't help who you like or love-be friends/date anyone who respects you and treats you with kindness and love. I never met my paternal grandparents and my maternal grandmother died when I was 8 years old. I never heard the stories about being beaten, dragged, spit on, lynched or murdered... The real nitty-gritty stories about the plight of the black man. There is a part of me that struggles to "connect" with my ancestors as I feel a bit far removed from their pain and experiences. Until now. My parents never really spoke about their own experiences either. Just yesterday I found out that my father is a gun owner after talking about the riots and looting that occurred over the weekend. (I'll be 35 this month and I never knew). It wasn't until I attended an HBCU that I would see real black pride up close and truly begin to understand what it meant. And once I got married and had my son, I began to walk in that profound pride.

There has been an undeniable rise in blatant racism and white supremacy in America in the last few years and it is solely due to the president's lack of leadership, intelligence and apathy among this country's most vulnerable and disadvantaged. His ego and privilege have not only set our country back, it's left a path of social & economical destruction with no real hope or promise for a future. Life in America for black people has never been equal and I'm no longer waiting for the day when it will be. The likely hood that my son will one day protest for his own people as a full grown man is high. He may be yet another generation who has to literally fight for his life and that is wrong on so many different levels. Prayerfully, he will still be alive to do so if he chooses. But I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of checking in, being present and showing up. I want to hide and stay in the perfect bubble that is my home. My safe space. Life is hard enough, but white privilege is blaring all over social media and even on our TVs as white police and looters destroy our businesses and communities. And then there is the silence of some that speaks volumes. There are some questioning our outrage like we haven't endured violence and injustice for over 400 years. Wouldn't you be fed up if you were taken from your home to go and build someone else's and forced to watch your family die day after day, year after year? Exactly.

Last week, I had the pleasure of being selected to attend a private Zoom event with Stacey Abrams to talk about black maternal health. It was such a wonderful space to share, learn, reflect and PLOT. Ms. Abrams dropped some major gems on the call as she told us about how she fights the good fight and even shared her own struggles with continuing on when we as black people are let down time and time again because others won't step up and help us do the work.

Here were a few take-a-ways:

• “Once I got to the end of my stages of grief, I realized there was a new stage. And I called that stage, ‘PLOTTING’.”
  
• “One of the best ways to avoid exhaustion is to make sure you bring friends.”
  
• “I have to remind myself that the work I do is not because I believe I can fix the world. I have a responsibility to try. My obligation is to try to find, not only solutions, but to find allies and to find systems-- to build those systems-- so that when I am exhausted and I can’t do anymore, it doesn’t stop because I stopped.”
  

Stacey said so many things that resonated with me that night and it was quite interesting to hear her unfiltered experiences in politics and as a black woman. I also got a chance to ask a question and Stacey basically gave me the push to pursue some things I had been putting off until later. But I may not have later, there is only now. The noise of the ignorant and the actions of the wickedly unjust will not be dominated by the out cries and heartbeats of deserving lives. Not this time. There is clearly so much work to do.

See, I'm dealing with death on two fronts. Black Maternal Health in my work and Breathing While Black on a daily basis. Oh and did I mention we are still in the middle of global pandemic?! I had a talk with God recently about all the things that I want to do in life. I literally said out loud, "God, give me the time to do it ALL". I want to leave such a grand legacy that no book will ever be able to fully tell the impact me and my family had on the world. What I've come to realize is that I am more than my own dreams. My life has true purpose and there are things outside of my dreams that I will accomplish because God wants me to. So I will prepare. I will do the work to make real change. And my son will bare witness with my husband at my side.

Ten years ago, I never would have thought that this would be the current state of America. But I guess no matter how advanced we become, hate will not just simply disappear because it is a learned behavior. Truth is, black folks are sick and tired of being sick and tired. And as much as I have tried to ignore and deny a connection to my elders and ancestors, I feel them more and more every day. I hear their call for me to be greater. To continue to do much needed reproductive and political work. So I will look to them, God and my circle for comfort and peace to guide my next moves.

And so.... The Plot Blackens.

An update on Best of Both Worlds Doula Services operations and information from local hospitals and national health organizations:

Now that North Carolina has entered Phase II of reopening, Best of Both Worlds will still be taking precautions by practicing social distancing from the general public through July 4th.

I am excited to announce that I am taking birth and postpartum clients due in July and beyond. In addition to in-person consultations, phone and video conferencing consultations and prenatal meetings will still be available for your convenience.

Travel doula services will be available in October at my discretion.

NEW SERVICE: Beginning in July, Adult and Infant CPR/First Aid training will be available to clients, small businesses and birth workers. Instructor: DeAntony Collins

Please note:
Starting today, I will only be conducting consultations Tuesday-Thursday. Beginning in July, booking fees will be included in all electronic transactions and will show up on your invoice. Thank you for understanding.

Reduced virtual services will be available through the end of June as well. My operational hours have not changed and I am available by phone, text, email or video chat for your convenience.

Zumba classes will resume at the Laurel Hills Community Center in July. I will be hosting a few outdoor classes in June. Check out my Fitness Momshell Facebook page for updates.

Reminders:

• Know your rights. Hospital policies are not law.
• Advocate for yourself and reiterate your birth vision when necessary.
• If you or someone you know has given birth during the COVID-19 pandemic, please feel free to participate in my Birth in 2020 project. Learn more here.

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Below you can find all of the latest information from local hospitals regarding COID-19 and visitor policies. These policies are changing every day so please be sure to confirm what is stated here and on their website by calling or emailing. I will try to keep this post updated as I receive new information from the hospitals and other local doulas.

*UNC Health Care/Rex Hospital

Update from UNC as of Thursday, June 18th, 2020: Effective Monday, June 22nd, one designated, screened visitor per patient for the duration of his/her stay will be permitted in the inpatient areas at UNC Health hospitals in the Triangle area. Please check the hospital website for visiting hours and other specifics. Doulas will be allowed to accompany a laboring mother in addition to the designated birth partner. There will be a screening process and a mask from the hospital will be required for the entire stay. The Operating Room (cesarean sections) policy allows one support person. *Doulas must have gone through the OR training at UNC to provide support there.

*WakeMed Health and Hospitals

Update for WakeMed as of Thursday, May 7th, 2020: All WakeMed facilities are now allowing doulas plus one additional support person! The Operating Room (cesarean sections) policy allows one support person and a doula at Wake Med Main.

Women's Birth and Wellness Center

*Duke Health

Update for Duke as of Monday, April 27th, 2020: Duke Hospitals policy now states that every birthing person is entitled to a support person regardless of COVID-19 status!

NICU visitation policies: Likely one parent at a time; Screening questions & temperature checks. Some hospitals will have had COVID-19 testing during labor depending on hospital.

Wake County Health Department

The * indicates the hospitals that are COVID-19 test sites.

Remember, you are the patient/parent and nothing should be decided or done in regards to you or your child(ren)'s care without your consent.
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Evidence Based Birth
EBB has a downloadable consent form that you can print off and discuss with your provider. You can find it here.

COVID-19 response updates & resources for North Carolina 

Center for Disease Control (CDC)

World Health Organization (WHO)

National Institute of Health (NIH)

The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG)

Food & Drug Administration (FDA)

La Leche League International

Postpartum Support International